Sunday, December 14, 2008

I Too Can Change

There was a part of my life that I was cruel and heartless at myself.
I was selfish, inconsiderate, and blind.
It may seem that I went through that process differently unlike all others that I've read online, in magazines, and seen on TV.

I chose to move forward.

Just recently, I asked myself if I was able to forgive myself for it. I searched for that certain feeling of lightness--freedom, if I did feel it. That wonderful fleeting emotion when you find closure--like rekindled friendship. No. Never.
Learning from that experience but never really understanding the lesson that it taught me.
I just moved on with my life, it seems. Cruel.

A few friends have approached me these past few years, asking me to help.
I don't want to be a precedent of a unwritten advocacy.

Thinking now, part of my closure for that cruel part of my life is to stop sharing.
To start forgiving myself.